A review of Elena L. Botelho and Kim R. Powell's book, The CEO Next Door

The CEO Next Door, by Elena L. Botelho and Kim R. Powell, calls to mind the title of Thomas J. Stanley's book, The Millionaire Next Door, so I was expecting it to be a little bit more of the same, possibly even in connection with the Millionaire series. I find myself enjoying The CEO Next Door more, because it focuses more on the habits and choices of the people who form the basis of the book. Where The Millionaire Next Door focuses more on specific attributes, and slightly unhelpful data about the consumption habits of millionaires, The CEO Next Door is somewhat more akin to The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People in that it is more principle-based.

I can almost imagine The CEO Next Door being presented in a business meeting; it has a clear, concise format, with main points, summaries, and even a flow chart of sorts. Each set of habits is stated in a concise way, followed by anecdotal and empirical evidence to support the assertion.

I guess I could argue that I'm co-CEO of my household, but the fact is, I haven't been "gainfully employed" for almost 10 years now, so this might seem like an odd choice of book for me to read. However, I selected it in part because my husband is in a managerial position at work, and I was curious about whether the book would have any good advice for him in his work, even though neither he nor I have CEO aspirations. The other reason I selected the book was to see if it had any helpful advice for me. After all, running a household does have some parallels to running a business.

I'm planning on having my husband read the book later, because I found it understandably more applicable to the workplace, but I did find value in the book for myself. I felt like it was a good read, and did not consider my time to have been wasted reading it.

A review of David Allen Sibley's postcard collection, Sibley: Birds of Land Sea and Sky

This collection of postcards by David Allen Sibley is easily one of my favorite things I've ever recieved in the mail. I could have reviewed it the minute I opened the box. The quality of the paper makes me feel all grown up and professional, and the artwork is like a gallery of fine art prints unto itself (which I'm sure it has been at one point). It made me want to frame them and put them on the wall.

The birds are absolutely gorgeous. The box separates the birds into five categories: waterfowl, woodpeckers, wading birds, songbirds, and owls and raptors; and there are really great examples of each one. I love that there is a very simple and clean look to all of the cards, but that the birds themselves contain the rich details of their models.

This book also has brownie points, because my mother is a bird-lover, and I have many memories of her pointing birds out to me on drives and in our own backyard. I have thus far sent her two postcards, each of which had personal meaning for me, because of our shared experiences. I absolutely love this postcard set. And, be real, postcards are just super fun.

I received this book from Blogging for Books in exchange for my review. This is my honest opinion about the book.

To people who need a lift

Dear Stranger,

Sometimes, we all feel a little blue. Or a lot blue. When I was sixteen, I wrote a poem, a refrain of which was:

I can't grow up, and I can't grow down.

I'm in too deep, and I'm going to drown.

I have bipolar disorder, most frequently manifested by long bouts of depression. I get feeling low. I truly appreciate the God-given talents of others to lift our souls. There are so many talented and brilliant people out there, y'all. I am sometimes blown away by how amazing people are. Like the people who designed the bed frames my girls use; assembly instructions: tighten two screws! That right there lifts my soul, and I'm not even being facetious.

Media can be so depressing, even destructive at times, but there are so many great things out there. My friend's mom once told him that he would never be "missing out" by avoiding dirty songs and movies - and whatnot - because he would never run out of things worthy of his attention. These are things I consider worthy of our attention, and soul-lifting:

The short film: Validation

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cbk980jV7Ao

Some people see goodness, and say goodness, and when that happens in our direction, it truly touches our hearts. The kindness of others can be a blinding light on the darkest night. I have been given this blessing so many times in my life; by friends and strangers. I love this short film about offering validation - and the love story is beautiful too.

The movie: Mom's Night Out

This movie is for every mother (or anyone, but especially relatable for moms and dads) who feels like they (and their best efforts) aren't enough. My husband and I always laugh really hard during this movie, but it always strikes a deep chord with us, because we can say "we've been there"...not so much the part about jail, or the baby in the tatoo parlor... :) Check this out from the library, buy it for $5 - the truth and affirmation in this film will speak to you.

The song: Nessun Dorma

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rTFUM4Uh_6Y

I'm specifically referring to Pavarotti singing it, because that's my experience with it. The sweeping beauty of the orchestra, and this great man's voice, bring me closer to God.

The song: Glorious

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GytW_rgr0RM

Sometimes we don't feel like we're fitting in or have a purpose, or that we're loved. Stephanie Mabey and David Archulete remind us that we're all part of God's plan.

God loves us, and He gave us people in our lives to lift us and inspire us. More than that, He gave us His Son. I'm so grateful.

A review of Sakyong Mipham's book, The Lost Art of Good Conversation

I think people are getting rude. I don't notice this so much in conversations where the parties are physically present, though it does occasionally happen, I mostly see it online, particularly Facebook. People are anonymous so they can say angry, hurtful things, or make fun of others. Or, they are speaking to a faceless multitude, so they feel no need to moderate their opinions. I don't know the extent to which I do this. I haven't got much of an online presence; I usually just chat with Amazon reps when something goes wrong with my order. But I've deliberately attempted to switch my chats from I am a displeased customer and you need to fix this  to Something went wrong, and I'd really like your help figuring it out. So one reason I was interested in reading a book called The Lost Art of Good Conversation: A Mindful Way to Connect with Others and Enrich Everyday Life is: I'd love to see and be a part of the return of greater civility.

The second reason I wanted to read The Lost Art of Good Conversation was that during bipolar depressive episodes, it becomes difficult to engage in conversation. The simple acts of carrying on a dialogue, making eye contact, and paying attention are abrasive and overwhelming. Especially if it's a small child, who wants to crawl into my lap and get up in my face. I want my conversations to be more genuine, and come more naturally even during low energy times for me.



Did it work? Yes. I do think the book is helpful. I did pick up a few pointers and a few thoughts to ponder. In a way it was kind of a sticky read though: I couldn't read it for very long at a stretch without feeling like getting up and doing something else, and the language is a little flowery at times.

A lot of this book stresses mindfulness and meditation, focusing on the physical acts of the conversation, even to the point of including a chapter about breathing. There's a lot of advice on how to be mindful, and some warnings about what may happen if we are not:

When neither individual is willing to touch nowness, the conversation lacks dignity. It becomes habituated and superficial. Questions and answers become rote. Intriguing words become ordinary. (p. 41, pp. 2)

The book addresses the way we talk to different people, even going so far as to say that our interactions with the cashiers at the grocery store are important. Another chapter goes into the time and place of the conversation. When Sakyong Mipham suggested that walking while talking can facilitate a conversation, it brought to mind the many conversations I've had with my husband as we go on walks, and how the experiences are a treasure to me.

One thought I particularly enjoyed was about patience. Mipham said, "It is said that patience is the guardian of our good qualities." (p. 184 pp. 2) I love that thought, and it truly makes me want to be a more patient person. I certainly need my good qualities guarded, and I can see the truth in this statement.

This book has made me more aware of how I engage in conversation, and I can see some improvement in my interactions with others. I won't say that I suddenly feel up to the challenge of talking to people during severe depressive episodes, but the interactions I do have are more meaningful.

The book does have it's difficult moments; like a chapter that was advocating talking slowly, but wrapped up by mentioning how rapidly some cultures speak, and saying this was based on mindfulness and awareness. One paragraph that went beyond me was about wisdom:

Wisdom - that which never needs to be expressed - allows for conversation to occur. ...One can see words as expressions of wisdom, and wisdom as the element of the inexpressible in each word. ... Words are like wisdom expressing wisdom to itself. (p. 219, pp. 2)

Although this book could be a dry read at times, I do feel like my time was well spent in improving myself and taking the time to be more intentional about how I interact with others. The book didn't really delve into how we interact through texts and online communications, but there were plenty of thoughts that could be extrapolated. I do recommend this book if you're looking for an "improving book".

I received this book from Blogging for Books in exchange for my review. This is my honest opinion about the book. 

More info:

About the book: https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/550804/the-lost-art-of-good-conversation-by-sakyong-mipham/

About the author: https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/authors/68526/sakyong-mipham/